Let me start off by saying thanks for all the emails. Some of you have found me on MySpace at www.myspace.com/adidasgirlno1 and read up on me a little more. Great! I want you all to feel comfortable with me, and feel like you know me.
I have received several questions along the same line. So let me group them together. I received this first question from several readers, so I'll answer it first. Before I do though, I want to say that these readers took a big step by letting me put their first name and area where they live. So, hooray for you!
Kim in Forest Park, Lisa in Hyde Park and Toni in Mt. Airy asked: “How do you know you’re gay?” and “How do I know if I’m gay or not?”
Let me tackle the first question.
I get a lot of people that say, "You just haven’t met the right guy yet!"
If I had a nickel for every time I have heard this, well, let’s just say I would be living very a comfortable lifestyle! "Finding the right guy" isn't a blanket solution.
Let me ask our non-gay readers a question or two. “How do you know you’re straight?” Easy question, right? You just know! Then, there's the, “If you haven’t been with a same sex partner, how are you so sure?” You just know. I know I’m gay just like you know what orientation you are. It really is that simple.
You don’t have to be with a same sex partner to figure it out. I’m willing to bet that you know and don’t feel you have to define yourself. Everything should come in a natural, not obligatory, way.
The second question is kind of the same question. I’ll just elaborate from above. How can you tell if I have tendencies to be gay? If you haven’t had thoughts about it, then I think it is safe to say you’re not. Although, some people keep it deep inside until their 30s, 40s or even older.
In my opinion, try to come face-to-face with this issue as young as you can. That way, less lives are interrupted. Some women and men get married thinking that the feelings will go away if they love their partner enough. Most likely, it will get to you sooner or later and you will not be able to live like that any more. I think it is harder to come out the older you are. That’s the conclusion I got from the survey I purposed to my friends.
If you want to be included in these surveys, let me know and I’ll put you on the list. It will be about many subjects. You can even suggest a question if you like.
Keep the e-mails coming to firstname.lastname@example.org! I love hearing from you.