Ask Rocco: The Long and Short of Elongating Muscles

"What can I do to safely reduce muscle mass or elongate muscles in my arms, legs and torso? I'm a rather buff chick and I'm tired of being asked to flex for the boys. Also, what does it take to eliminate and further prevent my "double butt cheeks" forming just below my buns? The thought of a bikini is making me freak."
– Geni K., Cincinnati

Geni, I have to tell you that you're hanging around the wrong guys. If they're asking you to flex for them, they obviously have some inadequacies… like a muscle on their own bodies, if you know what I mean.

If I were you, I'd take that buffness and slap them upside the head with it, instead of asking me how to reduce it and play into their stupidity. You've been given a gift, don't F*@k with it. If you really need to smooth out some of the muscularity, then I suggest cutting your workouts down to twice a week and reduce some of the intensity. I'm a genetic freak and can grow muscle if I think about weight training and that's what I did to reduce some of my bulkiness.

To answer your second question, I've never heard the term "double butt cheeks," but I can assume what that statement represents. This is probably not my place to say anything, but screw it. Don't you have better things to freak out about than worrying about wearing a bikini that's five months away? Maybe you're just a worrier and I should mind my own business, oh yea… that's right, you wrote me.

Stop worrying. Rocco's here to help, but you have to promise me that you will send my editor a photo of the before and the after just to show you that your worrying was not warranted. Stop doing squats because I know you are doing them. Long stride lunges performed on the same leg for 30 repetitions followed by an exercise called "mountain climbers" will suspend your butt like it was on strings and do away with the "double butt cheek" folds.

Mountain climbers are performed as follows: Get down on all fours, then position your left leg straight out in back of you while bending your right leg and bringing it underneath your torso and to your chest. Now alternate this process for 60 seconds. You can do as many sets as you feel comfortable with. When summer comes, don't hesitate to show your new butt off because I think this year's swim suits will be very flattering on you.

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