Coach Shari: Rules
Yesterday, I traveled to Columbus to visit my sister. It was her birthday and I wanted to take her out to lunch. After discussing our many options, we settled on our destination and made our way to the restaurant. As we were walking to the door, she commented on my shorts.
“Are you wearing white shorts because it’s the last day you can wear them?” She then shared that that was why she had decided to wear her white shorts. This was the last time she could have them on until next year because it was Labor Day. I thought about her comment for a few seconds before responding to her statement. I replied that it really hadn’t occurred to me that this was my last wearing before I was forced to put my shorts in the drawer.
Mind you, I said all of this with a smirk on my face and a sarcastic tone. I then asked her why it was acceptable to wear a white shirt anytime of the year, but white on the bottom half of your body was unacceptable after Labor Day? This last question didn’t bode well with her. She shared that she didn’t care what I decided to do, but she always abides by the rule.
The next morning, I woke up and went to work out. After my shower, I perused my closet to decide what to wear. I caught sight of my white pants and replayed in my head the whole conversation from the day before. With a smile on my face, I grabbed the pants off the hanger and proudly put them on.
Yes, it was quite a rebellious act. I was wearing my white pants the day after Labor Day! I tried to pay attention during the day to see if anything unusual would transpire from this risky decision. I don’t want to disappoint you, but absolutely nothing happened. No one stopped and told me that I had to go home and change. The waitress did not refuse to serve me lunch at the restaurant. I didn’t see one stare or whisper about my lack of fashion sense. In fact, I felt incredibly sassy all day.
I suppose the big question to ponder is this: Why do women abide by rules that make absolutely no sense? Why wouldn’t you do what feels right to you? Why wouldn’t you just trust your own judgment?
It’s very possible that you were, like many women, taught at a young age to be agreeable and follow the rules. You were probably encouraged to please others and were rewarded for doing so. Even if you’ve become strong and confident, it’s easy to fall back into old patterns. You might blindly adhere to the rules that others have set for you without giving thought as to whether they make any sense at all.
The happiest and most successful women in life are able to identify when they should follow the rules and when they should break them. Now that I think about it, the happiest women know how to MAKE the rules!